Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Glimmer, Shred of Hope

My wife was reading some Kyrgyzstan adoption forums today that hinted that things were supposed to get moving again yesterday (January 12th).

I haven't heard anything official, so I almost don't dare to hope. But when you hear that a group is supposed to start signing dossiers this week, how can you not have a glimmer of hope?

But then there's the fear, both of it not coming true and of its possibility.

If this is just a rumor: Despair.

If it's not: Life will change forever.

So what to do with this shred of a rumor?

Pray, yes; but how?

Tears stay in my eyes, prayers in my chest, and my hope hangs precariously over my head. Is hearing unconfirmed rumblings worse than hearing nothing at all?

~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Expectant Father

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Economic Crisis and Soliciting

I came home today to see the surest sign of our economic crises taped to my door:


Obviously things are so hard right now that local businesses have resorted to hiring illiterate children to tape fliers to our doors. This particular paper was taped right over our NO SOLICITING sign.

It always makes me laugh.

~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Expectant Father

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Still Waiting on Kyrgyzstan

So, it's been over a month and a half since my last adoption update.

We have heard nothing in all that time.

For those of you patient enough to keep offering an occasional prayer for us, our children, and their country of origin, we still greatly appreciate it.

Perpetual prayers tend to bother me because I begin to feel like they are rote and ineffectual.

And waiting has been hard. I know that I'm adopting but it's something that I'm now passively doing. I don't feel like I'm involved in the process. I'm not excited. This whole thing seems more like an historical fact than a present reality.

I'm not feeling so great emotionally at the moment, so I don't really have anything else to say right now. It hasn't been the best day in my life.

Thank you all for your love, support and prayers.

~Luke Holzmann
Filmmaker, Writer, Expectant Father